How to push through fear
“Do one thing everyday that scares you" - Eleanor Roosevelt
Feelings of doubt and fear begin to creep in as you think about your dreams. Your mind begins shooting off reasons why you shouldn't follow what your soul longs for. Your thoughts become worries like I can't do this because... I'm not in good enough shape, I'm not a good enough writer, I have kids and a family, I don't want to be vulnerable to others' criticism and judgment, no one cares about what I have to say or offer or I don't have enough time. This is simply fear talking - trying to protect you from rejection and failure with self-doubt and excuses for why you shouldn't follow your dreams.
If you want to do something new or make a big change in your life, what is really stopping you other than the fear of the unknown? You will have family, friends or even strangers tell you that you can't follow your dreams or what you want to do is unrealistic. People will tell you that you should just take the "safe" and "secure" route. How many people do you think feel fulfillment and happiness taking the safe route? This is YOUR life and unless you're harming yourself or someone else, no one should be able to stop you from following your dreams.
It is incredibly satisfying to break through the walls of fear. When you get out of your comfort zone and do what scares you, you will learn so much and make great strides towards whatever it is that you're trying to accomplish. A good way to start is by writing down 5 goals or things you really want to do, but you're scared to do for one reason or another. Then break those 5 goals down into several sub-goals or clear, actionable steps. Make sure to set deadline dates next to each main goal and actionable step and then commit to those dates and follow through, even if you're scared. Sharing your goals with a few supportive friends or family members also helps you to stay on task since you're being held accountable to what you want to do. You will also build much more self-confidence by feeling the fear and doing it anyway.
One thing I was fearful of recently was doing my first Facebook Live. I was so nervous about doing this that I kept procrastinating until I made myself set a date and announced the date and time publicly. This comes back to fear of judgement, failure and the unknown. What was the worst that could happen when I pressed that Live button and shared my knowledge and thoughts with family and friends? What if my family broke out in screaming and chaos in the background or I didn't know the answer to a question? None of these situations would be the end of the world. Fear was controlling me, but once I pushed through that fear I began to feel that it wasn't so scary after all to record a video, go Live on Facebook, publish blogs, share information and my knowledge, etc. Those mountains I was climbing turned into ant hills pretty quickly.
People want to see and hear from real people. When you send out your newsletter and there is a misspelling or error, your kids are screaming or talking loudly to you during videos or phone calls with clients or things just aren't going as planned, what does this really hurt? It shows people that you are human and that you have the same challenges in life that they do. It helps people relate to you more. It shows that you aren't perfect - no one is. All you can do is accept that it happened, try to plan or do better next time and improve as much as you can going forward. The fear of what others will think of you if things don't go perfectly can stop you from accomplishing so many goals. Let go of the need for perfection. Let go of worrying about what others will think of you. The world needs what you have to offer and your soul needs what it longs for, so get out there and take action, push through those fears and come out stronger, more resilient and happier.
What fear can you push through today?
